||[Apr. 30th, 2009|11:51 am]
The pig, if I am not misled,
Supplies us flu, which leaves us dead.
Some call it "swine" and some say "Mexican";
I use a different, darker lexicon.
- by Doug S, with apologies to Ogden Nash.
Similar offerings solicited in the comments.
This porcine fever is so dull -
The news is bad and papers full.
But I shall not forswear the pleasure
Oh Bacon Sarnie, what great treasure!
OK, not a patch on yours, but I tried and have set the bar low enough for anyone else to do better!
Wash your hands with slimy gel,
Cause you just cannot tell,
Who may have it, who may be
Recently back from Mexico City.
Stay away from me - out of my space!
You might sneeze flu germs in my face.
The papers tell us the news is dire -
In seven days we will all expire.
The Daily Mail's shot their staff
(We only wish, but not by half)
They inoculated everyone
No excuse for not coming in.
They say this flu is causing death
But here's a cure - hold your breath:
Take some Lemsip and a cough drop
If you want swine flu to stop.
Silent, unseen, the culprit hides
In crevices, nooks and crannies.
Out of the blue it floats and glides.
Killing babies and grannies.
Like a ninja, swine-fever strikes
So very slick and quick.
Parasitically it hitchhikes
Amd makes us all pig sick.