Songs of innocence and of experience - VAT, HMRC, and their employees Moe, Curly and Larry. [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Douglas Spencer

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VAT, HMRC, and their employees Moe, Curly and Larry. [Dec. 21st, 2011|04:06 pm]
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Letter from the VAT man to me, late September (paraphrased from memory):
    We have determined that you owe us £1,057.00 -- please pay up pronto, melonfarmer, or we'll haul your sorry ass into court.

Early October: *me pays*

Letter from the VAT man to me, mid December (quoted accurately but abridged):
    A routine audit of your VAT account has revealed that there is a credit of £1,057.00 for which, at present, there is no corresponding liabilty.
    Detals of the credit are as follows:
    ELECTRONIC PAYMENT 12/10/11 £1,057.00
    Please check your records and indicate, by ticking the appropriate box which of the following applies to the payment.
    1. I have submitted the remittance in error. Please return the payment. [ ]


There being no boxes to indicate "I submitted the remittance when you demanded the money with menaces you complete twonks", I will tick box one and return the letter.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: replyhazy
2011-12-21 04:08 pm (UTC)

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Wait -- they'll give it BACK??

Around here I reckon they'll just "hold on to that for you."
[User Picture]From: flickgc
2011-12-21 04:18 pm (UTC)

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It might be worth calling them, just in case?

No, I didn't think so!
[User Picture]From: dougs
2011-12-21 07:26 pm (UTC)

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I always do my very best to keep my contact with government agencies to a minimum.

I've done the sums, I definitely didn't owe it -- all my VAT is up to date, and my liability has typically been between £300 and £500 per quarter (although that'll go up a little in the new year).
[User Picture]From: ingaborg
2011-12-22 09:03 am (UTC)

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Agreed! Don't rock the boat at this point.
[User Picture]From: alexmc
2011-12-21 04:27 pm (UTC)

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I had one of those once because I did no business that quarter and forgot to enter a zero VAT return. So they made up a figure and asked for it. I paid it and got the money back several months later.
[User Picture]From: daveon
2011-12-22 12:36 am (UTC)

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Heh. I was just extolling their virtues over the local Business and Occupation tax monkeys.

I spent 30 minutes in an exploratory talk with an accountant about it yesterday.

Me: I'm sorry but I don't really understand how to calculate the city portion.
Him: Ah, yes, well you're not meant to. Basically (redacted)
Me: Boggle
Him: Exactly - so we need to work out if you owe A or B and then work out if we want to then work out the square footage of the bedroom we run the company out of... even then, we might be in a new situation where you're under the threshold for the local portion but over the threshold for other taxes...
Me: And about the other taxes?
Him: Oh, yes, these are on gross receipts but charged at 3 different percentage rates depending on the work you do, and then for other services you'll have to add a separate tax to the total because we count that as a sales tax...
Me: But only for stuff in Washington
Him: That's right... except of course...

And so on. Oh, and the taxes are all on gross receipts with no allowable deductions...
[User Picture]From: sarah_mum
2011-12-22 08:21 am (UTC)

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Insert the words "response to your" between 'in' and 'error'.
[User Picture]From: pisica
2011-12-22 10:38 am (UTC)

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I messed up my taxes a few years ago - completely my fault; I always work multiple part-time jobs and didn't get the UK tax system yet and handed the wrong form to the wrong company, or something - anyway, I checked the following year to see if they owed me money (they usually do) and they said 'you owe us £75' and I said 'fair cop' and they clawed it back through adjusting my tax code.

Then the year after THAT they gave it back as an overpayment in previous years.