Do you believe in Jesus?
I do. This should be no surprise to any of my regular readers.
Have you got your Christmas tree up?
Is this where I "come out" as a pagan? I think that there's something wrong with finding a tree, killing it, bringing it into an alien environment, swearing about the needles it sheds for two or three weeks, and then throwing it away. We had an artificial tree once, but it posoned the cat and resulted in sparkly turds on the lawn. So there is no tree.
What does it look like?
What is your favorite part of it?
Do you have an advent calendar?
No. I'm counting down, but I don't need a calendar to do that.
Do you like the nativity story?
I like it -- if it's in context, which is the only way the story makes any sense at all.
I dislike the way a porcelain-pink baby turns up magically nestled in squeaky-clean straw, with none of the mess you'd expect from a birth in a stable or a cot converted from a feeding-trough.
I dislike the way that we magically forget how close Mary got to being dumped and becoming a single mother.
But most of all, I dislike the way that, every year, we put him back in his cot after eleven months of neglect, and never give him a chance to grow up.
What are you expecting under the tree?
No needles! See above.
Who are you getting presents for?
I'm never very organised on the presents front. I'm not terribly good at that sort of thing. About five people amongst the close family, and two or three others, are getting presents -- I'm expecting similar numbers in return.
Did you believe in Santa when you was younger?
No. Not ever. But we all conspired in the fiction to avoid disappointing the grandparents.
Did you leave him mince pies and sherry?
Where are you going for Christmas?
Who are you sharing it with?
My Mother is staying with her boyfriend in Reading over Christmas, and on the day itself I'm going to his son's for the day -- who is, coincidentally, also my cousin, since Mother's boyfriend is also her late sister's widower.
Are you going to dress up?
What will your outfit be?
I might wear a tie with some sort of daft festive design on it. But it won't play the sort of nasty tinny tunes that cardboardnewman's tie was playing on Saturday.
Any Christmas parties?
I have already been to two separate Masonic Christmas dinners. I don't think there will be a company Christmas do, but I'm likely to go out with a client or two.
Are you going to go to church?
Yes. At least three times during Christmas -- possibly a fourth, depending on scarlatti
What is your favorite Christmas movie?
Oh, please. What am I, some sort of media fan? Put on some carols from a cathedral with a nice long acoustic. Or the Cirque du Soleil, or Archaos. Or some sort of magic show.
Who do you want to unwrap this year?
scarlatti. But it'll be next year, just, by the time I get the chance.
What have you bought for someone that you want?
Someone that I want? Who would that be, then?
Do you have a turkey for Christmas?
I won't. But I'm sure that my hosts on the day will have one.
Do you watch the Queens Speech?
Yes. Possibly twice.
Ever kissed anyone under mistletoe?
Probably -- but I'm not likely to have noticed it there at the time.
Red or Green?
I'm more likely to be wearing green, although on Christmas day, the liturgical colours are white or gold.
Have you Christmas-ified your bedroom?