Douglas Spencer (dougs) wrote,
Douglas Spencer

Some thoughts at the closing of the year

2003 was a year which heralded a lot of changes, and I just want to place on record some of them.

Firstly, there's all the consequences attendant on living without masks. It's changed my life -- and I'd like to think it's changed it for the better. I can be myself, now, in all sorts of places where previously I was playing a role -- at work, amongst my family, in fandom. It's gratifying that the exercise has been as uncostly as it has -- I don't think I've lost any good friends as a result, which was something I'd worried about.

Secondly, the year closed with some major changes at work. Boss A, who was a thorn in the flesh not only of myself but also my other colleagues, has now gone. He's now a full-time employee of one of our clients, but there are mechanisms in place which mean that he and I won't be dealing directly with each other any more. We're quite excited at where the new company is going.

Thirdly, my re-integration into SF Fandom is proceeding apace. Apparently I'm a big-name HHG fan now, and the biggest event of the year, the BBC's Big Read project, has seen me as the main point of contact between the BBC and ZZ9, the official appreciation society. I've also put out a fanzine or two, and been to more conventions in one year than I have before.

Fourthly, and most importantly, there have been some interesting developments in my personal life.
I've fallen in love with someone new. I've fallen hard, and I'm still falling, which is why I'm typing this in a departure gate at Heathrow airport. It's provided much to make me feel good, and a few things that have caused me pain. And it's provided good material for this journal. I've remained fruitlessly -- and hopelessly -- in love with a second person, and confirmed my former assumption that there's no prospect of taking it further, and I'm negotiating an encounter with a third, although it's clear that I won't be any more than a very secondary Secondary in this case. And each of these three people know about the other two, and (whilst they're not all at ease with the situation) they each understand and accept what I'm doing, and in some cases even encourage it.

2004 looks like becoming a very interesting year.

I'm going to be offline for the next nine or ten hours while I'm flying out to the USA. In the meantime, a very happy new year to you all.

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