Douglas Spencer (dougs) wrote,
Douglas Spencer
dougs

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Why do I write?

Posted simultaneously to poeticsforum and dougs

I have been writing some prose fiction recently and none of my characters are doing what I want them to do. It's been intensely frustrating and last night I got cross and asked myself "Why do I bother". I closed the file and scowled at the laptop.

And then the lines below wrote themselves. A bit of minor polishing this morning and they're ready to roll.

Why?

I thought about my writing, what my poetry is for;
It sometimes hurts to build a verse, I sometimes end up raw;
I feel my muse has hijacked me as its poetic whore,
But I prevail.

To ride the edge of sanity, to stride along the blade
Which cuts the mask away to leave my own true self displayed:
It leaves me feeling dark as night. It leaves me feeling greyed.
It leaves me pale.

My poetry can capture parts of how I feel and think,
Imprisoning my heart and soul in phospor or in ink.
I sometimes, on occasion, with my readers forge a link,
And sometimes fail.

The darkest lines I write are when my life is hard and worn.
My fervent hope is, reading it, the reader's soul is torn,
For in that dark epiphany another bard is born:
My holy grail.
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